Remember the Darkness - Forget the Light

While reading Cormac McCarthy's The Road, i came across many lines of the book that really hit me. The quote that was most memorable for me was 'you forget what you want to remember, and you remember what you want to forget.' Not only is this sentence too relatable to ignore, but it is also completely relevant to my own life. Really attempting to remember something good is a challenge. A good dream can fade from your memory in seconds, no matter how hard or how long you sit there trying to recall the details. Then there is the aspect of trying to forget something, ironically making you remember it again. The more you attempt to get something out of your head, the more you are thinking about it - bringing it forth and refreshing the incident in your mind over and over. This quotation took place in the novel when the father was forced to murder a man basically on top of his son. The gore and horrific images haunted the son's mind for days, days in which he was absolutely silent. Images that cannot be erased from the mind seem to have embedded themselves deep in your memory- so far they are unable to be retrieved. Another aspect of the novel i took from this particular quote was that the bad sometimes overrides the good. In this book especially, the difficulties they face are their main focus. They are constantly waiting for something to go wrong, and are wholeheartedly surprised when things actually work out for the better. Even with the father's reassurance throughout their journey, the young boy only knows of the things he has seen- most of the sights being horrific. If he were to forget what he remembers - what would be left? What would he even want to remember from his life? The darkness they face each day seems to be a reflection of their minds. A place where the images of what the world has become are stored, either to be remembered or forgotten. The Road and this quote have taught me that life is certainly worth living to the fullest, spent making good memories that could one ay be forgotten. But it is the bad memories that shape us into who we are and allow us to grow and develop so we can in fact live this one life we have in light rather than darkness.

Strength on the Road

The Road, written by Cormac McCarthy brings forth an aspect of life that many of us rarely even give thought to. What is life when there is no life left? The Road tells the story of an anonymous man and his son traveling the country in a time that i believe to be post apocalyptic. With no names, no food, and no source of travel these men test their strength each and everyday just by surviving. The anonymity found throughout the novel gives it an eerie sense of abandonment. Names don't matter, nothing matters. The only thing worth living for is to see what is left. They are unaware as to what still exists of the world, and the son never even knew what the world was before this mess. Struggling to stay warm in the dead of winter, the men only have a tarp and a cart to protect them. The father's unconditional trust in the world is refreshing throughout the story, and gives the reader a sense of confidence in their survival. Although the men are on a constant hunt for food, the reader is always trusting that things will work out because the father constantly reassures the son that everything is going to be okay and they will not starve. Along their journey they come across good guys and bad. The bad being really really bad. Encountering the location of a herd of cannibals, the father and son escape the holding center of the victims who are impending their death. This scene was hard for me to deal with, and apparently this part of the movie is even more heart wrenching. Although i am unable to relate to such a situation, this instance demonstrates the weight of the novel perfectly. The Road is the type of book that really makes you think about life, and realize how lucky you are to have the things you do. The constant search for things we take for granted each and every day made me understand that i am lucky to have food and shelter available for me at all times. The way i connected to this book was by putting myself in the son's shoes. This is all he has ever known, and all he ever will. He is strong, and while i was reading i was wondering if i would be able to deal with things as well as he did. This book demonstrated the importance of appreciation to me, and showed me what unconditional love truly means.

Loving These Poems

Artificial Flowers by C.P. Cavafy invokes my spiritual side and allows me to comprehend the beautiful yet frightening aspects of life. Real flowers posses temporary appeal, but will eventually diminish, reminding me that everything you touch surely dies. When you are with someone and never want the love to end, artificial roses are comforting because they give you a sense of permanence. Real flowers will decease no matter how hard you attempt to take care of them, resembling that the effort put forth in a relationship could one day be insufficient and the love could therefore die. The one aspect of real flowers that I feel relates to relationships positively is that they are all so unique .... not one flower is the same as the others which shows that each relationship is one of a kind because the two people that it consists of are distinct as well. In Artificial Flowers, the poet explains that fake flowers are better than real because of their foundation. It is strong and prevailing, always the way you expect them to be. C.P. Cavafy explains that the craft of the hand presents more vivid colors that could not be produced by nature, which says to me that the effort put into a relationship will always overpower the notion that the couple is just meant to be together. Sure there is a reason for the occurrence but without dedication and work the relationship would fail. To me, "true Art" in this poem is a spiritual reference. The poet is presenting that glass and gold are more beautiful forms of art created by God than the simple colors and textures found in nature. I object this notion because I feel that nature produces more wonderful things than which could ever be improved or manufactured by man, but I also see the meaning behind Cavafys message. The permanent enhancements of the artificial flowers are important. You can find beautiful flowers just like you can find beautiful relationships. Starting from the foundation given, upgrading the flowers to fulfill an eternal life gives them a sense of worth and the chance for infinite admiration. The appreciation will always be there, because the beauty will not fade. The only thing that fades from real flowers is life, and partnerships take a certain dedication and constant valuing as well. The poet seems to suggest that we have to take advantage of opportunities to make the things we love about our lives last. 

Love After Love

Love After Love, by Derek Walcott, is a beautiful poem that reminds me of someone who has just gotten out of a long relationship. This stage of their life had temporarily changed them, and maybe not necessarily for the better. This person had lost his or herself along the way, and now that they are alone they must find who they were prior to the relationship. Feeling as if he or she has been broken in half, they must reconcile with who they once were in order to be whole once again.  Focusing every ounce of attention on the person they were with, they now are forced to face themselves and see themselves for who they truly are because it is all they have left. Sometimes complete dedication is a downfall. Cathexis needs to be contrasted in order for a healthy relationship and a healthy life, but when you are absolutely infatuated with someone, it can be hard to see that. Finally finding his or her self is a great feeling because they have finally realized that they have had this great being inside of them, it just was shaded because all of the light was being directed toward the other person. Love After Love describes the revelation of a person who has found the importance of themselves, and has realizes that they weren't even expecting this to happen. They had lost themselves so much along the way that they had no hope in recovering what they had before such an immense devotion. Now that it is over, they have to take down the remnants of what once was and focus on what their life has become. Rather than staring at the pictures and letters from the person who is now irrelevant to their lives, they have to sit down and attempt to love themselves. Life was not wasted loving this person, but now they must focus on what is left ... and what is left is themselves. This type of self awareness is absolutely necessary in the hopes of living life the way they want, the way they have always pictured it to be. Why sit around and bask in the sorrow of what is no longer there? They can now take life on and live it out according to their rules. If they find someone to enliven this newfound soul, that is wonderful. But if not, at least they love themselves and see the world for what it is, which is beautiful. 

"Does It Matter?"

Halfway through Steven King's Doctor Sleep. Having nightmares and such. I've noticed some emerging patterns but I'm not completely sure if they link quite yet. No obvious connection has been implied at the point I'm at in the novel right now, but the constant repetition of the phrase "Does it matter?" by various characters leads me to the assumption that this statement actually does matter. King consistently follows up this saying with the description as being a "cold tone". Along with the eerie tone behind this phrase, the only characters I've observed who say this are the ones involved in the phenomenon of "the shining". From my understanding, the shining is an extremely unusual ability that allows the possessor to look into the minds of others, recapture events from the past, and telepathically communicate with and manipulate others. Although some people have a slight touch of this gift, the main characters in this novel seem to have an overwhelming and at times troubling amount of this particular power. Rose the Hat is the primary leader of the life draining group called the "True Knot." She consistently uses this phrase to support her ideas if there is ever any questioning by her fellow tribe members. This group of people feasts on the souls of those who possess the shining, and have no mercy when it comes to the torture they implement while murdering these innocent people. The True eventually run into the extremely powerful Abra Stone, a little girl who possess enough power to telepathically communicate with others who have been born with the shining as well. The strength of Abra's "steam" draws the clan in, with desire in their eyes to feast on her and gain their much needed strength back. Dan Torrance is the man with whom she has communicated since before she could even read. This small world has lead Dan Torrance and Abra's parents to have close connections with the same people, allowing them all to assist Abra in her journey of defeating Rose the Hat. Now that I have completed the novel, I am able to say that there was no direct relevance to this saying and the overall plot of the book. It seems that the saying "does it matter?" was just a general thought of the characters and portrayed the bravery and confidence in themselves. Doctor Sleep was one of my favorite books so far, and the infinite plot twists and unexpected occurrences held my attention all the way through.   

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon

In the film Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, the fight scenes are specifically crafted to slow the high pace of the movie down while intensifying the sword fighting aspect of the movie. Producer Ang Lee strategically used ropes for the actors as opposed to the typical special effects for this film, because it sets it apart from all of the others and gives it an entirely new dynamic. The Chinese belief that if you have reached full spiritual awareness, walking on water and flying are plausible aspects of life is definitely portrayed through each fight scene. This control of elements is best displayed in the famous scene between Jen and Li Mui Bi in the forest of bamboo. While they are running through trees, flying through the branches and virtually defying the laws of physics, Jen and Li Mui Bi are actually illustrating a very important aspect of the film. This specific scene exemplifies the impact of the ropes controlling the actors, due to the fact that the Chinese belief is dramatically stressed and played out. Ang Lee's use of these visual effects allows the viewer to obtain a better understanding of what is actually occurring in the scene, and gives them time to comprehend the true meaning behind what is happening.

My Weekend with Morrie

Tuesdays with Morrie was assigned by theology teacher Mr. Ingram to each of his Death and Dying classes at the beginning of the school year. Usually, i dread reading books i am forced to read for school, but Tuesdays with Morrie has always sounded like a decent read to me. In class, we had the opportunity to watch one of the Nightline episodes Morrie had been featured on. This gave us readers the chance to relate a face to the main character and see exactly who Morrie is. It was even more interesting while reading the novel, coming across part of the book that were also segments in the Nightline episode. Being completely honest, i waited until the last possible moment to read this book. I kept procrastinating and pushing it off because i thought it was just another assignment. To my surprise, when i started reading Tuesdays with Morrie, i really couldn't put it down. I am actually glad that i read the entire book at once, because i was really able to get a full glimpse into the life of Morrie. He was a witty, charismatic, and spiritual man. These characteristics did not diminish when he was diagnosed with ALS, they actually grew much stronger. I am truly able to say that the life lessons found throughout this novel have changed my life for the better. The different perspectives i now have due to Morrie's outlooks on both life and death are amazing. The crying, laughing, and smiling caused by this novel was addicting, i didn't want it to end. I wanted to hear a much greater number of Morrie's viewpoints, i didn't want him to lose his ability to talk. I felt i knew him on a personal level through the great discussions Morrie and his former (and favorite) student Mitch had while his disease ran its final course. These two men depended on each other, and i believe every person who has read this book was depending on them as well. I looked forward to each chapter, each Tuesday they met. A different topic of our overall lives was discussed each Tuesday, and this continued for fourteen consecutive weeks. This book has taught me the importance of overall forgiveness, and in contrast, the unimportance of many of the things we focus our lives on every day. Although he was terrified, Morrie did not allow this disease to control his life. Instead, he wanted this misfortune to better his life. Morrie did not put concentration into material things, the newspaper, or the current and horrifying events of the physical world. Instead, he decided to focus on his inner self. He opened his heart up to the love of others. In turn, he allowed himself to love those around him with his entire heart. All of these changes Morrie made for himself also helped me change, just by reading it. The time i spent reading this book was so worth it, and my weekend with Morrie has forever altered my view on so many aspects of life.